Death Cannot Do Us Part: Still

 As your time now becomes short,  you are still. Peaceful. It has always been you and me, for as long as I can remember. But now one of us wont be here anymore. We will cease to be "us". But we will still be us.
You appear to be gone, but I know you are still there. You can hear me now, in your last moments. So, I say this to you because death cannot do us part. I will always hold on to you. Even still, when you become still, I will still feel your motion. Your emotion. Within my now still heart.
And now you are gone. To that other place. There is stillness. Within you, within me. Part of me went with you, so we are still together. Death cannot do us part.
I feel the stillness within me. You are still but you still radiate life. I know you are still there,  even though you are now still. We are still together because death cannot do us part.
Today the crowds have gathered. They see you, still. Calm.  At peace. I see your vibrant glow,  within. That part will never leave me,  or you. Death cannot do us part.
Every part of you still remains with me. We can never part. We are connected through death and life. Connected forever. A part that can never part. We never cease to be "we".
 

I promise you that we will always be us. Death cannot do us part.

From one blade of grass to another

"Ah, life is glorious, isn't it?"

"well kid, it is, but it is dangerous, and fleeting. Enjoy it while it lasts, because it won't. I have seen many like you come and go."

"What do you mean?. Life is great. We sit out in the sun all day, get some water on us when that becomes necessary.
The people they love us. They love to look at us. We are glorious and green and they all want us."

"Well, all that is true, but I have seen many like you, and they are now gone. They fall into that trap of growing proud and strong, and then, one day, a mower comes along, and you are chopped off, and dead."

"That won't happen to me, I will grow so beautiful, they will only want to trim me."

"Five million of your friends said that last year, and now, here I sit, with you, and they.....are...done."

"So, what is your secret then?"

"Keep your head up. Pay attention. Watch out for the guy that owns this place. When he is around, hide down below some other blade. Let him get cut. Then sprout back up and make him desire you."

"Wow, that is great advice, thanks. Is that all there is to know?"

"Hardly. Stay away from those weed people. They will crowd you. They will suffocate you. And the owner doesn't like them. He will dig them up and kill them with sprays. If you are anywhere near them, you will be a casualty of their demise, their ultimate demise."

"Again, thanks. I never thought of that."

"There is so much you need to learn kid. We can talk again, if you survive the night. I heard from the blade of grass on the other side of the lawn that the owner is doing yard work this week. Better watch your back."

"I will".

"And grow deep roots, that is the only way you survive long term. I saw Moses part the red sea, and I will see Martians land on the train tracks over there one day. If you want to do the same, make a plan, and stick to it."

"I want to survive. I really do. I guess I thought my being glorious and green was enough. I thought they appreciated me. That I was special."

"You mean nothing to them. They can go to the store and get millions more, just like you. Where do you think you came from?"

"I never thought of that, I guess I just wasn't thinking. I wasn't using my head."

"Lay low kid. Weeds are stupid. They sprout up, and glorious and proud. The next thing you know, they dig them up..or spray pesticide on them. Idiots. They not only get themselves killed, but some of my best friends died because of them."

"Again, thanks."

"Remember one last thing. You think I am old and worn. I am not. I just appear that way. When the owner comes around, I make like I am just new, green, proud, bright and shiny. He looks at me, then he looks away. I have survived doing that forever."

The pleasures of the flesh

Why?
Why?
Why?
That is what I asked myself as my hand moves from my hair down to my breasts. I slowly caress them, thinking of him.
I don't want to be like this, but I can't help myself. I want him.  I want him to want me. I know it's wrong of me, but desire consumes me. Takes over and squishes my desire to be eternal. The pleasures of the flesh are so strong. I can't resist them. I am going to hell,  I just know it.
I said I wouldn't flirt, but I can't help myself. He does things to me. Makes me wet just thinking of him and those eyes. I told him I was going to take a shower. I knew that made him hot. I wanted him to be hot for me. Made me hot to think he was hot for me. Temptation has overcome me and is winning. I am helpless to stop it.
He is so tempting. I can't resist that. I know that. I think of him as I tease my nipples. Thinking of him putting his lips on them. He put that sexy lips pic up just for me. To tease me. To tempt me. It worked.
The soap careens down between my breasts and towards my belly button. My hands follow it, just as his mouth would as he devours me. I know what I am going to do next. I can't stop myself.  Earthly and womanly desires have overtaken my existential hopes and dreams. I have to finger myself. I have to think of him inside me. I am weak. I know that.
My past haunts me. I have always been a slave to sex. To sexual pleasure. I gave that up. Or so I thought. But the desire is still there. I can't suppress it, no matter how much I try.  I dream of it, of him.  I wake up wet and frustrated. I need it. I need him. I have to have it. I try to resist it, but it is too tempting. I play with myself for an hour, only thinking of him. On top of me, making love to me. Touching me all over. My thoughts of god and eternal salvation take a back seat to my earthly desires here. At the moment that I cum, I feel my best. The highest. Ultimate euphoria. Then the letdown. I feel weak, guilty, mad at myself for being who I am. Is that wrong? I don't even know anymore. I hate myself but I love how it feels. How do you stop that? I have no idea.